Mooch, You're fired! And take your stinky 'playbook' with you. Especially the passing for 5 yards on 3rd and 8. Although I have personally fired you a few times, it didn't seem to have any clout, but it's now official! About time Matt!!

Dick Jauron will take over as interim head coach and attempt to breathe some life into this team. Jauron's first act as coach was to announce Monday practices if the Lions don't win on Sunday.

If the offense doesn't score more than 7 points on Sunday. The offense will have to go through a spanking line with the defensive players holding the paddles. Dre Bly will be waiting at the end of the line to impart Blyism 101: The Art of believing your own PR about how good you are.

Additionally, the number of times Joey is hurried or sacked will be how many times the offensive line shall be used as tackling dummies by the defense. Dre Bly will quiz them on his stats, wrong answers will be met with a clonking over the head with his cast.

Finally if a pass is dropped the offender will spend a mandatory hour for each drop listening to Joey play his piano, at which time Joey will simultaneously spit champagne in their faces screaming, 'How's that for Champagne Joey huh? How you like me now? Huh?!'. Dre Bly will be lying on the piano writhing in ecstasy over his Pro Bowl appearance.

There was a very friendly debate at work today between me, Dutz, BaBaBaBooey, Gooch, Stubby and the English Cop (hahahaha). Millen seems to be taking a huge amount of blame for the Lion's woes.

For example: Millen doesn't know what he's doing, he was a football player & commentator. So I asked Gooch if he thought he could do a better job, I'll let you take ONE guess on what his answer was. Funny how ALL of us think we could do a better job with absolutely no experience in the NFL, but we rip on Matt because he doesn't have 'experience'.

Overall I like what Millen has done with the defense. And I really believe most of the pieces are in place on the offense. He did a great job of getting Woody and Pollard to join the offense. I think the only real bust is Chuck Rogers.... oops and Mariucci. But I distinctly remember everyone hoping that the Lions would for ONCE get a real coach and that coach was Mariucci. Hindsight and all that, so we should give Matt the same leeway.

I made fun of Chuck Rogers for being confused and I now apologize. Because under Mariucci's tutelage apparently EVERYONE became confused including the fans. I've never seen THIS much dissension on a football team. Hell even the Viking's Loveboat (although very bad for PR, and not PC at all) didn't create a split the way Mooch did here by lambasting Joey at every chance, making the rookies think it wasn't them it was Joey.

And make no mistake, once Mooch started pointing the finger at Joey it became Harrington season and almost everyone threw on the orange vests and took their shot, if only to deflect the scrutiny of their own sub-par performance.

As you all know from reading my blogs I have NEVER been a Joey supporter. I'd like to thank Mariucci for changing that. If nothing else (and that remains to be seen) Joey has carried himself with quiet dignity and held himself to a higher standard than those around him. In the face of all the BOO's and teammates ignoring him and being benched he has NOT quit on the Lions. And for that (along with the fact that Dick Vermeil wants Joey) I am firmly entrenched on the Joey bandwagon. I may even stand when he is introduced next week. sniff sniff We all need to repay that dedication.

I believe that Millen had a very different vision of what he wanted the Lions to become and Mariucci was just to freaking stubborn to think outside of his shitty west-coast offense. I think where the blame really falls on Mooch, is when he came to interview knowing that Harrington was the golden boy. Mooch should have declined the job right there and then instead of trying to destroy a promising young career.

But hey who can turn down all those millions of dollars? I think Mooch came in here blowing smoke up Millen's ass and Millen returned the favor today.

Good Riddance Mooch, Peace be with you and whatever poor team you sucker in next. I'd say I'm going to miss you but I'm not a liar. Maybe Garcia will give you a ride out of town. Oh wait, I'm sorry... wasn't that Jeff on the radio earlier today saying that even though you are a great guy, it's really more important to have your team respect you than like you. Mariucci season has now officially opened folks... Everyone jump off the Mooch Love bus quick!!
By the way.. Hey Dre... You have grown on me, and although I'm still not convinced of your greatness at Corner, I am convinced that you are exactly the type of personality every team needs. T.O. who? You go on with your bad self, clonk you some o-line pansies, and pad your stats all you want. You're so vain, you probably think this blog is about you, don't you? don't you? Aaaaaaah, well I guess part of it is and in jest cuz I know you can take it and even laugh about it.

Oh and one other thing that's good about Mariucci getting fired is that I won't have to listen to his wife or daughters(?) call the radio stations anymore pretending to be fans, making the rest of us girls that really like the sport look bad.

I wasn't at the game but I managed to get a picture of Mariucci coaching in typical fashion on the sidelines.

How many different ways is there to blog The Lions SUCK!!? Mooch is on the radio right now with his whiney, apologetic voice and I can't stand to listen to the freaking moron anymore!!!

Mooch told his team not to beat itself up over the loss because Mooch takes the resposibility for the loss, TOO LITTLE TOOOOOOOOOO LATE Mariucci!!! YOU SUCK ASS!! He sounds like he's going to cry like the whiney little BeYotch he is. You don't want the players to beat themselves up? And you sure aren't going to, then who should ASSWIPE? Nobody right? Oh, I'm sorry, you're shouldering the responsibility right? HOW? By giving everyone a free pass.

MILLEN!!! You better FIRE HIS ASS!

I love how Garcia came in after Mooch yanked Harrington and bombed! Hell, he threw at least 2 passes without even looking where they were headed. Gosh Darn IT Mooch, you played your ace in the hole and it wasn't good enough. You've got nothing left. Take yourself, Garcia and your shitty west-coast offense and get the hell out of here!!

The Lions beat Arizona. It was a very lethargic game from the stands. I think everyone (the fans) really took a good thump after losing to Chicago AGAIN last week, because the fans just didn't have it in them this week.

WELCOME BACK ROY... Roy Roy Roy!! I never gave up hope, and it's damn nice to see the guy that made us all sit up and notice last year make a comeback!!

So the game was pretty boring, a lot of fans left at half time, we left with like 5 minutes left and much of the stadium was already cleared/clearing out. We could be looking forward to an upset at Dallas, but that heckuva coach Mooch, gosh darn it just had to go and CREATE controversy!! Well Steve, you're a heckuva guy and we love you gosh darn it but take your stubborn dumb ass to some other city! YOU SUCK MOOCH!

Harrington will not be starting against Dallas if Gacia feels he's healthy enough. Nothing like killing the freshly laid continuity 'Coach'! I'm really starting to believe that Mooch is sabotaging Harrington just so he can be 'right' and that is just immature. I hope that Millen is starting to realize what a mistake he made in bringing his pal over. San Fran fired him for a reason, just ask Jerry Rice.

Not only is Mooch going doing his best to f*ck up Harrinton, but he's also started in on Kevin Jones. KJ can't catch?? Well hell *NO SHIT* that's why he's a RUNNING BACK. Not a wide receiver! Oh, and wasn't that Bryson that dropped the next pass?! Why in the hell did you DRAFT THREE 1ST ROUND WIDE RECEIVERS if you aren't going to pass to them (because they're too far away after 7 yards) when you had 3 freaking RUNNING backs that you wanted to throw to???!!!!! F*CK! Mooch must be partying with Chuck too much and killing all his damn brain cells. Helllloooo, does this make sense to ANYONE out there??!! Why even have wide recievers??!! Geez it's like going to a dentist to get your tonsils yanked out.

If you really want to pass to a running back try using your TIGHT END dumbass!! Oh wait! He dropped a ball too! Never mind.

In an interview when asked about his 3 back 'system' and why he can't give the ball to KJ 20-30 times. Mooch responded that KJ was a "good back", Toose "deserved" to play, and that Bryson was "worth his weight in gold".

Huh? There's a typical Mooch response in trying to build the self-confidence of his young studs. Maybe Chuck Rogers wasn't so wrong after all when he stated that he didn't know what his role was. Because I'm sure Joey & KJ are probably going to be hitting the ole' bong (allegedly) themselves after another year with Mooch. Hell, I can't stand pot and I'M about to toke on a big fattie!!

When pressed on the issue, Mooch wasn't budging. KJ will NOT be getting the ball more. ARE YOU READING THIS MILLEN?! Here hit this, you'll feel better.

KJ's dad actually called into the local radio station after the game and you could just hear the frustration in his voice also. He said that he felt bad and he don't mean to be no trouble-making father, but Mariucci doesn't know what in the hell he's doing. I can just picture the conversation over the turkey at that house this year.

The Ford's let Barry wither & die in the Fontes years and if Millen won't do anything I hope they stand up and get rid of Mooch before we end up watching Joey & KJ celebrating a Superbowl win next year with Dick Vermeil and the KC Chiefs.

There's a wee little bit of my mind that is wondering if Garcia is REALLY THAT hurt? So much so that he won't play. I'm wondering if perhaps after being in Joey's shoes for a couple of games, if he isn't just purposely taking a bit longer to heal to give Joey his chance to prove himself.

Garcia KNOWS the issues aren't ALL Joey's fault, and he also know that once he goes back in, Joey done in Detroit. From the little I've heard of Garcia and from listening to him on the radio, he seems like a guy that would do something on principle and I think he might just do it. If so, nice move Garcia!!

HEY!!! GARCIA for head coach!! hahaha, wouldn't that be the ultimate irony!! BEAUTIFUL!! Start the petition someone!

Okay, so I was going to post earlier in the week, but - well, I just didn't feel like it since my real job is sucking the life right out of me but there were too many things that happened this week to just blow it off - In my opinion, of course:

The Monday after each game there is an interview with the QB on 1270 am, not sure what their moniker is (obviously nothing catchy like DaFaN). On top of that they would have an interview with Garcia, because he was so open and honest and a great person to get the dirt from. I believe much of the Joey 'Blue Skies' opinion came from these interviews. And quite frankly I've never seen why people had such an issue with him thinking positively, being an optimist myself. OH and then I found out Joey was a Libra (like myself) so now his attitude makes even more sense to me.

Regardless, Garcia would come on the show and it was no holds barred. He called people out, he was aggressive, his tone of voice oozed confidence. That all changed the Monday after the Chicago game. He was a beaten man, and it only took two games. It was GREAT!!

When he was asked what the problem was he suddenly developed the Lions stutter, that is so freaking irritating. The defeat in his voice was palpable. I sat there wondering why all of a sudden he's not calling people out, sure he threw an interception and took responsibility for that, but where were his comments about the others on the offense? I had a flashback to the movie Any Given Sunday and suddenly it made sense to me. Although I think it was the 'STAR' running back in the movie, when the line stopped 'liking him' they let the defense come through to pound his ass. Now the offensive line has been compared to a screen door, so you certainly don't want to give them any additional reason to leave the screen door open.

How much does it suck to have to depend on players that are a bunch of mewling kittens? I've bitched about the attitude of these offensive (literally) players and their 'don't be mean to me, it hurts my feelings, I'm a grown man (love that one...hahahaha) and I don't need anyone reprimanding me' shit.

Grown man my ass!!! Real grown men can take well-deserved and honest criticism and...

*** NEWSFLASH*** OMG, the announcer on the field for FOX was just asked if Joey won his job back and before he would answer he made it a point to put on sunglasses - sheesh!

...Real grown men will take responsibility and step it up!! Apparently most of this offensive (literally) litter is still looking to suck on the tit of the coach and Mariucci is more than willing, and actually enjoys the feeling of being so needed. It definitely seems to be a pack mentality as Dominic Raiola confirmed during his interveiw today by saying:

'if I make a mistake, I know it, I make adjustments and I don't like getting called out on it, most of the guys on the offense are like that.'

Thank GAWD for Kevin Jones and for Joey Blue Skies (yes that came out of my mouth Stefani). KJ was that one kitten that was off scampering on his own, exploring, making mistakes but forever moving towards his independence. Going up to the meanest, baddest animal around and swiping at them, and we all love that little fucker don't we!!

Marcus Pollard is like the older sibling sitting around watching the litter and just shaking his head, thinking Millen should've picked a better bitch for this litter.

Roy - Roy, Roy, Roy was also like that his first year, before the litter dragged his ass back down. Cory Schlesinger is somewhere in between. Cory has also stated that he doesn't like being called out, thankfully-he's so good and has enough pride in himself that getting called out just doesn't happen.

Speaking of attitude (as I always do), I was explaining my 10% theory to Gooch and being the Cleveland Brown guru that he is, had to agree with me, although he said it was more like 5%. I'll try to be succinct for all you ADD friends.

To get to the NFL your skills have to be (using Gooch's percentage) in the 95-100 percentile of college players. Using that logic, there is only 5% seperating the best of the best from the worst of the best. That's really not a lot. So give me someone at 95% with the heart and attitude to play than someone at 100% with just their skills.

Enter Scotty Vines buh-bye Chuck Rogers. Hope the millions you made is enough to sustain you, maybe you could go to Miami and see your 'BUD' (hahaha) Ricky Williams and lament the unfairness of it all while scrutinizing Rush and The Beatles album covers, covered in a comforting blanket of ding-dong wrappers. More power to you guys. See YA!

Bobby Ross, a coach I happened to really like, threw his hands up in disgust with this team and it sounds like Jeff Garcia did the same... Ooops I mean he's injured. But Garcia sure as hell lost the enthusiasm he had after having the #54 surgically removed from his skin after the Chicago game.

I think Roy's time off may have been good for him. I think his just being away from the runts of the litter and hearing his quotes repeated in the media will shake those cobwebs loose from his head and he'll remember the superstar he was his first season and the fact that he actually LIKED Joey.

This is why I say thank gawd for Joey Blue Skies. AND in his last interview when asked about starting against Minnesota he said something along the line of, 'It was good to go out on the scout team, it made me get back to the love of the game and having fun. I'm going to open it up against Minnesota and go downfield and have fun and win a game, and if I don't.... oh well, what are THEY going to do? Bench Me?!' Way to go Joey, FIGHT THE MAN!! Or go down on your terms. And I'll say it for you, F#CK YOU MARIUCCI. There all better now.

I think we're going to win today (slight shadow of foreboding, but I'll ignore it - being Doll Blue Skies and all) I expect Joey to go to Vines and Pollard a lot. I think Roy will step it up and Cory & KJ will be stellar as usual. Oh and Raiola from the Clevelands Fans and myself to you, 'F#ck YOU BeeYOTCH'

**KICKOFF** Go LIONS

In a shocking development just announced Steve 'Mooch' Mariucci was fired from his position as the Detroit Lions head coach by Matt Millen. Matt Millen named the former Pro Bowl Lions offensive lineman Lomas Brown as Mooch's replacement.

Brown said, he can't wait to get his new team on the practice field. The practice field is where you create good habits. If you drop a ball in practice or miss a block, you're gonna run your ass off, and not just jog, but run your ass back to the huddle because the time clock's running!!!

Brown's first act as head coach was to suspend Roy Williams for refusing to get his ass on the field on 4th and eight, saying that he didn't feel like it. Lomas Brown said, "I'm disturbed by this!..."

***POP***

Oops, did I say that out loud?? Guess I need to keep my fantasy's to myself. Well we can only hope. Why NOT Lomas?

Lomas - Lomas - Lomas!!!!